Date: 30th October 2016 at 8:20am
Written by:

Head & Shoulders have announced Pep Guardiola as their new spokesman and star of several forthcoming advertisements. The deal brings to an end a four year partnership between the shampoo giant and on-loan Torino goalkeeper, Joe Hart.

Joe Hart – Head and Shoulders Advert

The Spaniard told ‘Soccer on Sunday’…

‘I am out to get the little blonde shit. Head & Shoulders? I wouldn’t touch my head with that poison. I have a team of Filipino women who wax my scalp with dolphin semen twice a day. But if stealing Joe’s gig pushes him a step closer to the exit door, I’ll talk shite about dandruff on camera all day long.

‘It’s nothing personal,’
added Guardiola. ‘I just need goalkeepers who can play a 10 yard pass. Give Joe the ball to feet and he’s as jittery as a nun at an orgy. I’ve seen new-born giraffes with better leg coordination.’

‘Soccer on Sunday’ broke the news before Joe moved to Italy, nevertheless I’m sure their article, which can be found here will no doubt bring a smile to your face.

Do these spoof stories do it for you?

Let us know via the comments section directly below this article.

Vital Man City on: facebook

Vital Man City on: twitter

Join Vital Man City

It’s easy to REGISTER HERE, simply click the link and enjoy getting involved!

Click for the forum