Date: 17th September 2009 at 9:52am
Written by:


Vital Manchester City regular, BlueWolfie sent us the following.

Obviously, as I write this (because it has yet to have been played), I neither know the line-up nor the result. However, one can hazard a guess at any eventual outcomes because they are seemingly always the same:

No score draw: This rarely happens xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Low-Score draw: UNITED: ‘That was never a foul, he was never off-side, we didn’t have Scholes, etc, etc’ – CITY: ‘We didn’t have our best players on the pitch’

High-Score draw: UNITED: ‘That last goal scored by (insert name of City player), should never have counted. We were robbed.’ – CITY: ‘We were missing Ade and Robi, and still scored plenty!’

Utd win by 1 or 2: UNITED: ‘Well it was obvious we were going to win, wasn’t it?’ – CITY: ‘You got lucky, our’s wasn’t a full-strength squad.’

Utd win by 3 or more: UNITED: ‘You were outclassed, out-played, City suck big-time, come back when you’re big enough’ – CITY: ‘You’re just a bunch of dirty ********’

City win by 1 or 2: UNITED: ‘You cheated, he was off-side, we didn’t have Scholes, etc, etc’ – CITY: ‘Not so small now, are we Taggart you old fart! Now bring on Chelsea and Liverpool.’

City win by 3 or more: UNITED: ‘It was nothing but a lucky win, we’ll still be looking down on you at the end of the season.’ – CITY: ‘You’re in £700m debt, just got hammered, and you’re ****, you’re season is already over, welcome to the Europa League.’

The only thing I haven’t mentioned yet is someone being sent-off. In addition, it’s a shame that the little girl Ronaldo isn’t still at OLd Trafford because he would have been a safe bet to see a red (same could be said for Dunnie though – except the ‘little girl’ bit). But after saying all of this just you watch, something will happen that I haven’t accounted for.

It will be a good game and I am, as always looking forward to it, I realise that it won’t be as good as it should have been, with no Ade, Robi, and quite possibly no Tevez – the latter of which, will be a big shame.

Still, come Monday morning it will have been just another game, regardless of the outcome, and we will set our sights on West Ham at home.

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